Mad Scientist Club - Membership: One
"Half an hour, Sherlock. Not even half and hour! Twenty-five minutes at most. And what was the last thing I told you before I left?"
"In my defence, John, I don't usually listen to what you say--"
"--of which you are perfectly well aware. Additionally, I would like to point out that the flat, indeed the entire building, is still standing, so burning it down isn't the issue."
"You're your own mad scientists club, you are. You're damned lucky you only got minor burns off this mess."
"You're also damned lucky I replaced the fire extinguisher and first-aid kit after the last incident."
"You're going to have to buy a new table and microwave. And kettle?! For fuck's sake, Sherlock! You melted the kettle?!"
"Do stop stating the obvious, John."
"You've not left me much else, have you? I can't even make a bloody cup of tea any more."
"If you'd only pause in your wild histrionics--? Thank you. I've already ordered a new microwave and kettle to be delivered first thing tomorrow morning. Also, there's ample time to shop for a new table right now."
"You think so?"
"After which, we'll go for dinner wherever you choose."
"Without any commentary from you?"
"You have my word."
"All right. You're buying?"